Expectations kill. When she's expecting care from her friends, that rejection and those words let her down. It turns a girl who smiles everyday cheerfully, crazily, into a lifeless zombie. When one's missing another crazily, being so excited to tell how much she misses him, one look on the screen brings the mood down. When she expects herself to cope well with her partner, friends, studies and future career, everything's fucked. Nothing can go well. When everything's well, she's tired. And shits happened again. After a long day, a sleep was supposed to heal. Heal the mind, let go of the past, be ready for a new start. That didn't happen.

No more naps. The only thing left is nap. Quit it, then things are settled. Stress killed too. That's why, don't let words bring the mood down. If I feel OK to have a bad nose day, what else could be wrong? Fuck my life. 180+. And now, there's you, there's them, there's studies, instruments, family.. how the fuck do you cope them all? This is fucking tiring.

Tried to nap and end up not waking.
Tried to practice, end up not finishing HW.
Tried to be nice to him, end up losing patience, stressing out in school.
Tried to be nice to everyone, losing concentration.
Tried to study, neglected instruments.
Almost thought I coped all, screw up an easy piece that I've been playing for so long.

Wtf is wrong with my life. I should just gtfo
I suck at being human. I suck at being me. I suck.