.

Many months ago, I've twisted the same place. Same way. The doctor said, whichever direction you twisted it, you have to twist it back to the opposite direction.

Bearable but sucks. I wanna be normal again. I need it for the competition. My footwork is slow. I know that. Of course I do. But seriously, I can't do it, with this ankle. It's not allowing me to move comfortably, especially backwards. Whenever backing myself, gah. There's that terrible pain. No one knows.

Should I try to fix it myself? I'm sure I won't make it worse. But seriously should I? I need to use it. From the video, I know, I'm slow. That day when I met an old training mate and cut in to play with her state player friends,  damn! I'm terribly guilty. The girls weren't that scary. They're girls. They don't scare me. He scares me. I know he's darn serious to everything. Competitions,  of course!  I can't ruin it. But I can't do it.

I asked, how do you want? Me standing in front forever or what? She said, anything will do, cuz she'll back up me wherever I go. But I know, playing this aimlessly without a strategy will kill her. The last ten points? We played with a way. A way he taught. And it works, a lot better. I helped to make her life easier. Can see that. I need to set up for him too. But seriously. I'm going to disappoint him.

Fuck you ankle. I should stop running and ONLY focus of footwork huh. Gosh. Please wish me luck. Imagining him hating me, just sucks. I can't live that. I can do this. It's not hard. Racket up, focus all the time, what will go wrong?