;

Am I begging for your return? I did it, and stopped it. As usual, my blog is to write and release shits that I want to. I'm releasing all these shits here so I don't have to look that miserable in front of my family. Do you get me?

Am I begging for your return? I don't think so, now. I'm telling you, I feel lucky we were together. I feel lucky we could even have a chance to meet because we're Malaysians, unlike China, they didn't even have fb. I'm saying, I'm lucky that you allowed me to appreciate you until this October, because you were supposed to quit since January. You told me, you could stay if I want you to. I wanted you to.. I'm saying, I'm lucky to have you for nine months plus. I'm really lucky that you came into my life even for just a while.

Am I begging for your return? If you see me reminding you about I still love you, IF you decided to return, My arms are ready. I'm always ready for you. If you realized you miss me, if you wanna give another try, I'm here. I miss you. Yes I want you back, but I'm not asking you anymore.

I'll want you as a friend. If you read these, I assume you still care. If you even signed in my blog to read these, you definitely still care, right? I don't know as a friend, as a bf who can't completely let go, or as whatever, Thank you. You scared me because it says new device signed in. But it soothes me stating "N9". I assume you care as a friend.

I wish for your return but I'll never expect it anymore. I still love you, it's really hard to actually stop. Let it be one sided so it's better for us. Let it be just me loving you and you don't have to do anything, just treat me like your friends.

A friend who's allowed to stroke your spiky chin, a special friend who gives shit about all of you. Dont push me away because I don't mind, I lost you and I can't possibly lose you again since you're not mine anymore.

Life just isn't life without you. Nothing else matters.